Why did the clown cross the road? To catch the rubber chicken.
What do George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Christopher Columbus all have in common? They were all born on holidays.
Why was the nose sad?
Becuase it wasn't picked.
Which is faster, heat or cold? Heat, because you can catch a cold!
How can you make seven even?
Take away the letter S.
Can you spell eighty in two letters? A-T.
What do you call a story
about a broken pencil? Pointless.
Why is 2+2=5 like your left foot? It's not right
What's the largest building? A library it has the most stories
Did you hear about the angry pancake?
It flipped !
What get's wetter the more it drys? A Towel!
Two pickles fell out of a jar onto the floor.
What did one say to the other? Dill with it.
Why can't a nose be 12 inches long?
Because it would be a foot.