What’s smarter than a talking parrot?
A spelling bee !
Why are frogs happy?
They get to eat what bugs them.
How do you keep a dog from barking in the
front yard?
Put him in the back yard.
Why did the chicken run across the road?
To get a little eggs-sercise.
Why don't bears wear shoes?
They like to walk bare feet.
Why don't dogs make good dancers?
Because they have two left feet!
Why did the bear take a ruler to bed?
To see how long he slept.
Why did the cows cross the road ?
So they could go to the MOOOOvies .
What did the cat get on it's test ?
A PUUURfect score.
Which animal sleeps with its shoes on?
A Horse
What does a cat say when he is surprised?
“Me-WOOW” jokes for kids
What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant ? Swimming Trunks
Long Island entertainers
funny jokes for kids
Q: What do George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Christopher Columbus all have in common?
A: They were all born on holidays.
Q. What comes twice in a week, never in a month and once in a year?
A. The letter E.
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it
Q: What goes up when the
rain comes down?
A: An Umbrella.
Q: Which is faster, heat or cold?
A: Heat, because you can catch a cold!
How can you make seven even?
Take away the letter S.
Can you spell eighty in two letters?
A-T.
What do you call a story
about a broken pencil ?
Pointless.
Q. Why is 2+2=5 like your left foot?
A. It's not right
What's the largest building?
A library it has the most stories
Did you hear about the angry pancake?
It flipped !
What get's wetter the more dry it drys?
A Towel!
Knock! Knock!...... Who’s there?
Cows go...... Cows go who?
No silly, cows go moo.
Knock Knock........Who's there?
2:30............. 2:30 who?
I made a dentist appointment cause my 2:30 (tooth hurty)
Knock, Knock...... who's there?
Dwain......... Dwain who?
Dwain the bathtub am dwoning
Knock Knock........, Who's there?
Anna,........... Anna who?
Anna body know so more jokes
Knock Knock,....... Who's there?
Ben..........,Ben Who?
Been so long knocking my hand hurts!
Knock Knock...... Who's there?
Howie,.........Howie who?
Howie going to figure this out ?
Knock knock.... Who's there?
Claire,.... Claire who?
Clear the way I am coming in.
Knock, Knock.... Who's there?
Duet......Duet who?
Duet the best you can or don't Duet at all!
We wanted to share some of these simple jokes so you and your grandchildren can
laugh and giggle all day !
My granddaughters favorite joke
How do i know it's her favorite and best joke. I hear it at least 6 times in a row before we go onto something else.. And we laugh at it every time.
Knock, Knock...... Who's there?
Who........Who.Who?
What are you an owl?
What insect can be spelled with just one letter?
Bee.
Knock, knock......... Who's there?
B.C........ B.C. who?
B.C'ing you soon !
What did the spider do on the computer?
He made a web site!
Q: When does " b " come after " U "
A: When you take some of it's honey
Q: How does the ocean say hello?
A: It waves!
Grandparent
"It was really hard for me to stop doing the Hokey-Pokey."
GrandChild
"How did you do it?"
Grandparent
" I just turned myself around."
What type of music are
balloon animals scared of ?
Pop music.
If a balloon dog pops, it becomes an “air” dale.
Q. What did the birthday balloon say to the pin? A. Hi, Buster!
Knock,Knock. Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce make you a balloon dog for you, please.
Q. Why did the balloon cry ?
A. Because it saw a lolly pop!
Why didn’t Anna give Elsa a balloon? Because, she would let it go, let it go.
What is a balloon’s least favorite school activity?
What? A pop quiz
What did the balloon say to the doctor?
What? ” I feel lightheaded!”
What happens to a balloon when you rub it on your hair? It gets ecstatic.
Why is a blown-up balloon more expensive than a balloon that isn't ? Inflation!
Truth be told we are not very good at telling jokes so, we put more energy into our fun magic routines, silly patter,
and getting to know you chatter.
We love when kids tell jokes and stories, it's a great way for them to express themselves,explore their funny bones and what makes them tickle inside and out.
MisMatch & YooHoo the Magical Children's Entertainers in New York