Funny Jokes For Kids

Why did the clown cross the road?  To catch the rubber chicken.

What do George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Christopher Columbus all have in common?  They were all born on holidays. 

Why was the nose sad? 

Becuase it wasn't picked. 

 Which is faster, heat or cold?  Heat, because you can catch a cold! 

​How can you make seven even?  

Take away the letter S.

Can you spell eighty in two letters? A-T.

What do you call a story 

about a broken pencil? Pointless.

 Why is 2+2=5 like your left foot?  It's not right

What's the largest building? A library it has the most stories 

Did you hear about the angry pancake?  

It flipped !

What get's wetter the more it drys?  A Towel! 

  Two pickles fell out of a jar onto the floor. 

What did one say to the other? Dill with it. 

Why can't a nose be 12 inches long?

Because it would be a foot. 

Knock! Knock!... Who’s there?

Ron... Ron Who?

Ron as fast as you can before I get you!

Knock Knock... Who's there?
2:30... 2:30 who? I made a dentist appointment cause my 2:30 (tooth hurty)

Knock Knock... Who's there? Anna... Anna who? Anna body know so more jokes.  

                                                                         
 Knock Knock,... Who's there?  Ben...Ben Who?  Ben so long knocking my hand hurts!   
 

Knock knock... Who's there? Claire... Claire who?  Claire the way I am coming in.
 

Knock, Knock.... Who's there?  
Duet...Duet who?

Duet the best you can or don't Duet at all!

 Knock, knock.  Who’s there?  Wooden shoe.  Wooden shoe who?  Wooden shoe like to hear another joke? 

Who’s there?  Tank.  Tank who?  You’re welcome!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cows go. 

Cows go who? 

No silly, cows go MOO! 

Knock, Knock… Who’s there?

Razor. Razor who?  Razor your hand if you have a question!

We wanted to share some of these simple jokes so you and your grandchildren can 

laugh and giggle all day

My granddaughter's favorite joke 

  Knock, Knock... Who's there? Who...Who. Who?

What are you an owl?

What insect can be spelled with just one letter? Bee.
​    

Knock, knock... Who's there? B.C...  B.C. who? 

  B.C'ing you soon ! 

What did the spider do on the computer? He made a web site!

When does " b " come after " U "  When you take some of it's  honey

"It was really hard for me to stop doing the Hokey-Pokey." Grand Child;
"How did you do it?"
Grandparent; " I just turned myself around."

  What is the difference between "Boogers" and Broccoli? Kids won't eat Broccoli!!! 

Hold your index finger up and ask. Do you know why you can't use this finger?

Why? Because it's mine.

 What did my left eye say to the right eye?

Between us, something smells!

When does the alphabet only have 24 letters?

When U and I aren't there.

What type of music are 

balloon animals scared of? 

Pop music.

If a balloon dog pops, it becomes an “air” dale.
 

What did the birthday balloon say to the pin?  

 Hi, Buster!      
​

Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce makes you a balloon dog for you, please.

​

 Why did the balloon cry? Because it saw a lolly pop!

Why didn’t Anna give Elsa a balloon? 

Because, she would let it go, let it go.

What is a balloon’s least favorite school activity?  

A pop quiz

 What did the balloon say to the doctor ? 

”I feel lightheaded!”

 What happens to a balloon when you rub it on your hair? 

It gets ecstatic.

Why is a blown-up balloon more expensive than a balloon that isn't?  Inflation!

What do you call a bear with no teeth?  

A Gummy Bear.

Why are frogs happy? 

 They get to eat what bugs them.
​               

How do you keep a dog from barking in the front yard? ​Put him in the back yard.
 
Why did the chicken run across the road? 

To get a little 

eggs-sercise.
 
Why don't bears wear shoes? 

They like to walk bare feet.
 
Why don't dogs make good dancers?  Because they have two left feet!

Why did the bear take a ruler to bed?  ​To see how long he slept.

Why did the cow cross the road?  ​So he could go to the MOOOOvies .
 

What kind of stories do bunnies like? Ones with Hoppy endings.

Why did the bunny cross the road? He didn't want to be chicken.